No matter who you are or where you are in the world, you will always be in a relationship.
Good, bad or indifferent, you are still in a relationship.
If you are unemployed, have no family, no husband, wife, boyfriend, girlfriend you will still have a relationship.
The type of relationship you will have outside of these other relationships is just as important to your life. it’s a relationship with yourself
From the time we are born we are in relationships, initially with our mother. No matter who you are, or where you were born, you have to have a mother.This first relationship we all have can set out our life path, good or not so good. We cannot however blame our mother if our life does not turn out the way we wanted it to.
Relationships That Are Always Here
Here is an example:
Your mother raises you in a perfect way, that you are happy with. Yet another child is raised in the most appalling manner. Who has the greater opportunity to become happy in their life? Child A – with the perfect upbringing, or child B, with the not so perfect upbringing.
Child A has it all, but might not appreciate what they have and not enhance it still further. They might become spoiled and have no drive for life.
Child B however could be very spirited and full of life, overcoming all adversity, just to show they can be a success.
Your start in life, good or bad is only a starting point, in terms of time for adult life.
Child A has a few years head start over child B. With determination and the right type of action, both child A & B can equalise their lives in adulthood.
The relationship with yourself is the most rewarding or damaging relationship you can possibly have. No one else in the free world can hinder your life more than you can. You are the one who makes all the decisions concerning your own life.
Any other relationship you have with another person can be changed or under extreme measures, you can walk away. How do you, walk away from yourself?
Relationship with yourself
How many times have you had a bright idea at night before going to bed, only to wake up next morning and talk yourself out of it?
Your bright idea was your subconscious part of you thinking like a child. Original thought.
These thoughts are the ones that will guide you towards a happy fulfilling life. Your next morning thoughts are the thoughts that are said to be logical and sensible and are designed to keep you safe.
These logical thoughts have been absorbed by your brain over a period of time and are a reflection of your own observations, the comments made by others and include newspapers, relatives, friends etc.
Whether you are a religious person or not you will still have a spiritual being inside of you.
You do have a spiritual connection with others. All life forms have a spiritual connection. That we have no spiritual relationship, or connection to the universe is a widely held thought that has been suppressed over a period of time.
Look at a child, they are happy, running around, inquisitive, getting into trouble (adult definition). It is their spirit that gives them this energetic life. A child can go to bed late and still wake up early, full of life and ready to deal with the new day.
An adult can be lethargic, uninterested in the world and generally finds difficulty getting out of bed. In this state an adult is suppressing the spirit of adventure that lies within. It is always there, it’s just that over the years, this spirit has been neglected.
Our human brains are so powerful that the spirit within us all can easily be forgotten.
How do you improve your relationships?
First starting point would be to take an honest look at yourself.
The relationship you have with yourself should be the starting point if you want to change the relationship you have with others. Let me know your problem and see if I can help.
True Life Story
One true story concerns a lady Life Coach who is considered to be a great Relationship Coach. She has written many books on the subject of relationships, produced tapes & CD’s. She is very respected by a lot of female followers and gives powerful & moving seminars.
It was about 30 minutes away from the start of a seminar on relationships being given to a packed audience, mainly women. When she received a phone call from her husband to say he was leaving the marriage for another woman.
She was devastated, she had no inclination that this would ever happen to her. After all she was a top relationship coach. These things only happen to other people, such as the people in her seminar. “I will have to cancel the seminar, I am in no fit state to go on!” She thought. “What am I to do? Should I say I am ill? Should I go on stage and say nothing?”
After a while, she decided to go on stage. The first thing she did was to inform her audience that her husband had just left her. Silence fell on the room. The audience thought it was a ploy to get their attention. After a while they realised she was telling the truth. When she had completed her announcement the whole audience stood up and gave her their support. WOW! How magical was that?
Relationships are about understanding
It’s not about staying together for ever, unless that’s the way it works out. A relationship is about understanding each others needs and working together in happiness with each other. When an ego or self-image gets in the way, things can change. You & your partner originally came together because you had lots of things in common. Thoughts and ideas were shard with each other. You supported each other. After a while, your aims and aspirations might differ, you might start to drift apart. That’s part of life itself. If you can’t meet each others needs, or support each other, then you must move on.
You and your partner are both individual human beings and have different needs and desires. When they match, your relationship survives. When they divide, so must you if you are to survive.
The relationship coach realised this and changed her seminars to encompass the need for change. It’s the reason we are all here now, our ancestors changed or adapted so that we could be here now.
I have a lot more to give on this subject
Share your stories, or seek my advice.